Category: Real LIfe

The Three Quarters 30 – Year 2

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For the second January in a row, I am doing (participating in? torturing myself with? Choosing to eat according to?) what I call the Three Quarters 30. What is the Three Quarters 30? A variant on the Whole 30. Since I am vegetarian, and getting pretty close to being a vegan, the actual Whole 30 is near impossible. Last year when I researched the ‘program’, I found that the suggest to actually eat meat during your thirty days, which just isn’t going to happen. But what is Whole 30? You can read all about it, but in a nutshell it’s a program built on not eating anything that you want to eat. No grains (bread, rice, pasta, etc.), no added sugar (hello, sugar is in everything),  no beans, no dairy, and (gasp) no alcohol. In essence, it eliminates processed foods, plus sweets and alcohol and it is brutal. My Three Quarters 30 is based on the Whole 30’s recommended food list for vegetarians, though I don’t include eggs or seafood.

Why would anyone do this, and why am I particularly? I’m sure most people do it because they think they will lose weight or view it as a cleanse. I believe the point is to eliminate items that cause inflammation and move a person toward better health, but who are they kidding? People want to look good. My goal is a bit of a cleanse after the holiday season carb/sugar/alcohol fest, I feel gross. I want to reset my whole system, and of course lose some weight and look good. The ‘program’ hits on my two weak spots: carbs and alcohol. Oh, do I love my wine, and it loves me back, too. That love is settling in on my midsection for a nice long winter. Last year, it did wonders for my skin and I did lose a bit of weight, but possibly the best part of it was it made me aware of how certain foods (ahem, simple carbs and my favorite food group, sugar) impact me. When I ingested a lot of bread or personal kryptonite, peanut butter cups, after Whole 30 I was hyper aware of my bodies response, which was weeeeeeeee….. blood sugar! And it wasn’t a good feeling. One would hope I could learn to maintain that and eat less of these things for a longer period, but I slowly slipped back into my old habits over the year, leading up to the debauchery of the holiday season. This year, my goal is to kick off the year, but clearing out last years mess and starting fresh, followed by figuring out how to eat sensibly because I know in the long run, no gimmick or plan that involves long term deprivation is going to work. Being aware of what I eat and drink is the first step. So I’m off to make a breakfast smoothie. Wish me luck.

Priorities/Tick Tock

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Spend any amount of time trying to figure out how to find the time, how to make the time, bend time to your will, how to get what you want to get done in the time you have. Time, time, time, time, time… tick tock, tick tock (for those who remember when all clocks were not digital).  Read all the books and gurus on how to find the time, they will pretty much all the say the same thing:  you do have the time, it’s a matter of focus and prioritization.

You chose to watch tv, cook time intensive meals, spend time on social media or {insert however you’re spending your time here}. Do you really want to spend time in this cesspool? Facebook is giving your data away in outrageous ways. Someday there will be a breach and those New Year’s Eve pictures will be available for everyone to see, or worse used against you in some way. And do you really think retweeting articles or witty statements is going to change what is going on in the world? It’s not. If you care so passionately about a particular issue, get out there and organize, volunteer, find a job with an organization that will help make change and if that organization doesn’t exist, create one. If you don’t feel passionately about what you’re tweeting about, just stop and spend that time working on whatever it is that gives you a spark.

You chose to spend your time doing the things you say aren’t important over the things you think are important. You chose. You make the decision on how to spend your time, so pay attention to how you do. Write it down for a while and notice your patterns. Some things you will surely say you “must” do. Sure. I must go to work today. But in the long run, it’s my choice to stay at that job rather than figure out the work I really want to be doing and moving toward it. That seems daunting, so I’m starting by just committing to writing every day. Ok, I already wrote every day, but just bunk that no one sees, so I’m going to write every day and put it out there.

Oh, it won’t be easy.  Habits we want to change don’t go easily. They wrestle with our good intentions and sometimes they win. I just opened a site with an article about most searched for shows on Netflix by state. I must know!  Answer for my state is some show I’ve never heard of and whose title doesn’t inspire interest. But there is another show called The End of the F***ing World that intrigues several states. What is that about? I must find out, then add it to my list, then spend the rest of the week binging it!  Actually no I don’t. I chose not to do that. I chose to focus on what I’ve decided is important. You may make a different choice. If so I hope you enjoy The End of the F***ing World. But chose well, because we only have so much time. What do you want your life to be?

Black Friday

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Black Friday. The day we throw away all the gratitude and well wishes celebrated the day before to worship at the alter of our true religion, consumerism. Anything to save a few dollars so we can get more stuff. Now, I like to save money as much as the next person. But I’ve watched some of those hoarder shows, and though I’m not a psychologist or any other type of medical expert, I can tell all the stuff is filling some sort of emotional hole and seems like a cry for help. We seem to have a whole society of people collecting stuff, and since not everyone is tripping over piles of things in their homes, throwing away some stuff, too. It’s not healthy or good for the environment, but still we persist. Of course I’m using the royal we here, not all of you partake in this. Good for you.

I try not to even leave the house on Black Friday. There is no consumer good I am willing to be trampled or squish, pushed, glared at, or deal with anyone else’s short temper to acquire. But that doesn’t stop me from shopping online! Even there I am careful. A few years ago I bought a laptop on Black Friday. Best. Deal. Ever!! Except I never touched it beforehand and I loathed the keyboard. I mean loathed it. The keyboard did not make any kind of satisfying sound when you hit the keys and they were just far enough apart to force me to learn typing anew. It wasn’t worth the money. Also, though I received free shipping, it was shipped from China directly, which took over a month. I followed it online, as it apparently took the longest possible route on the slowest possible ship. I almost made a map to see all the places this poor laptop traveled. Thank goodness, the laptop wasn’t an emergency purchase. The old laptop was chugging along just fine. But all in all, not worth the savings.[1]

This experience doesn’t cause me to give up! There are bargains to be found, I just know it! I read the advise on things not to buy on Black Friday.[2] Don’t buy toys, gift cards, spring vacations… do buy electronics (but be careful of special Black Friday model numbers, some are lower quality). One link says not to buy winter wear because the best sales are after the holidays, one directed me to a doorbuster of 60% off of a jacket I had already been eyeing. I think you know what I did. Oh and I also managed to buy new winter boots for 50%. These are the same style as my current boots, which have just reached the end of their life. I swear I’ve had them for something like ten years. Land’s End, people, they last forever. At 50% off, how can you go wrong?  Lesson: check out the deals. Maybe there will be better deals later, but if you need something now, take the risk. Greater than 50 or 60 percent off in January does me a lot less good. I’m cold now![3]

But the thing about the list of things you should buy on Black Friday is not too many of them scream holiday gifts. I guess there are people who appreciate appliances and televisions, but these are fairly large gifts that require scheduled deliveries.  So are we really shopping for ourselves?  Well, we need things, too!  So after the thrill of my 60% off coat and 50% off boots, I was mad with the need for more savings blood on the alter. What else do I need!  I know! My printer currently only prints. It’s NOT an all in one and maybe once or twice a year I’d like to scan, occasionally I even like to make a copy of a document, though I can do that at work… but don’t stop me with your logic!  Sometimes there are printers for $29.99 on Black Friday. Fire it up, internet.

The search now on, I see there ARE printers for $29, $39 and up. Yes! But wait, didn’t I buy a whole bunch of ink for my current printer a few months ago? I don’t want that money to go to waste. That is their plan to get me to waste money on ink! Hell no. You can’t catch me in your web! Maybe there isn’t that much ink left, anyway. I pad over to the desk. Oh.. three of the XL black cartridges and a few a various colors. Hmm.. that isn’t insignificant. This amount of ink probably cost more than the printer, inexpensive, build for the home creature that it is. Let’s see if I can find a printer on sale that takes the same ink. Yes, that is the ticket!

It’s not that easy to find printers based on the ink they use, it turns out. You can do it, but it’s hard to know if it’s correct. By searching for the ink on one office supply site, I find a list of printers that are compatible, but when I look up some of those printers, they list different ink. Gah! Naturally none of the printers on super sale are on the list anyway. Let’s review the available features: printing (duh), scanning (yes), copying (yes, please), fax (don’t care. Do faxes still happen?), paper tray with automatic feeder (hell yeah), double sided printing (at home? Really? YES), double sided scanning (I remember once I thought this would be nice, so why not). It turns out that only one printer does both double sided printing and double sided scanning[4], so I guess I must chose. Double sided printing it is!

 

 

Thinking more about this,  I must have double sided printing! Although my household uses maybe half of a reem of paper a year (500 sheets, costing a whopping $5.99 if you buy the office supply store brand), I don’t want to waste paper. The trees! You could recycle. No, not using is better than recycling. You should absolutely spend more money to get the double sided printing feature to save printing approximately 125 pages per year. Duh!

Back to the comparison. None of the printers that have double sided printing are either on sale or take the ink I already own. Keep searching, keep searching. There must be one, there must be one!  AHA! There is one! Not on sale, in any way. First produced in 2014, so it’s an older model. Do I really care, as long as it does what I need it to do?  Nope. Let’s do a compare to the newer model which costs the same as the older model because it’s on super sale, but does not take the ink I already own.  Oh my lord, do you see the dimensions on that the older model?  It’s huge! It would require an armoire to hide it from being a distraction in a room.[5]  It weighs 25lbs! I can’t have that. I need to stop and regroup. What if I did give up on the ink I already have and buy the printer, scanner, copier, fax, toaster, hairdryer[6] that I really want? The internet is fired up once again. I research and research. Oh, there is a handy printer selection tool on canon.com. You put in what you want, it returns a list. Look at all these printers, scanner, copier, fax, toaster, hair dryer![7]  All of them more than I want to spend and do not use the ink that I already have. I’ve been tricked! Tricked I tell you! How do I know these printers, though some appear to be very marked down, are not this price every day?  Should I just give this up? NO! I NEED to scan, though I haven’t done it in over a year. I MUST be able print double sided, though I’ve never done it in the past, and could in fact, do that at work.[8] I consider buying something cheaply now and using up the remaining ink with my current printer. But there is an imminent move coming. Housing hunting is just on hiatus for Thanksgiving weekend.  I just don’t like any of these options, but I have to pick one right? I must buy something, right? I’ve made the decision to buy, right? The alter of savings needs another sacrifice, yes? Such a purchase dwarfs the amounts I am thinking of saving on this printer. Even if I saved 50% off the cost of a home printer, the amount saved is something to be scoffed at in a home buying transaction. An additional box to move because of a $50ish savings is not actually worth the aggravation.

So no. I don’t. Another printer is not needed, not right now.

Here is a lesson for you. It’s not the percentage you save, it’s the amount. If you save 50% on a $4 item, you may feel great about it, but it’s still $2. And $2 buys only $2 worth of anything else.[9] I think I read something like this in a Malcom Gladwell book once. Somehow saving .1% in a home purchase, let’s say $300 doesn’t feel as good as 50% on a $4 purchase. I don’t know why, but it’s true and it’s insane.[10] Do I go back and question my new coat and boots purchases?  No, because what is done is done and because I need those things. I do not, technically speaking, need a printer, scanner, copier, fax, toaster, hairdryer(5). I just want it.

And that is what should be your guide for Black Friday. What is the cost of this insanity? My cost was  my time. I spent way more time doing this research than I got in return in worth of the “savings”. Not even to mention the time I spent writing this to document my insanity (writers can break the fourth wall, too). Do you actually need this thing you are giving up your hard earned time or physical safety to buy more cheaply, or are you just sucked in by the insanity of it all. Only you know the answer.

Ok, I looked up whether these armoires are still made, and it appears that they are, but in my brief search I couldn’t find any from quality furniture makers of solid build, as mine is. I found the type made of laminate and is assembled by the owner. Feh. I guess I will hold on to his baby as long as possible. Just one more way I’m becoming a dinosaur. I have another essay to write on how Apple makes me feel like a dinosaur for wanting to hold onto my music files, many time-consumingly burned from CDs. Relying on the cloud seems nuts. Which brings me back finally to this essay as Apple is one of the place to buy on Black Friday. Apparently it’s the only day of the year they have a sale.

** Update ** Two days later and this printer is the same price as it was on Black Friday. It’s on perma-sale, apparently. See, fear of missing out doesn’t always come true. Also that printer will cost me more to move than it’s price, so I actually saved money!

[1] I am aware that being able to swallow a few hundred dollars in savings is a privilege, for which I’m grateful.  I hope you enjoy the footnotes used here. I’ve been reading David Foster Wallace recently and I do enjoy a good tangent that adds value, which of course I believe my tangents do, as did Wallace’s.

[2] https://www.retailmenot.com/blog/black-friday-best-worst.html

[3] Watch this spot for me complaining if these items reach 75% off in January.  Though one wonders if something can be sold at 75% what is wrong in the business model. Either it’s priced too high to begin with or they have made too many of them. So many of them, they are willing to take a loss? Hmmm…

[4] What hell is this?

[5] I own a computer armoire just for this purpose already. It’s a desk that you can close the doors on and hide all of ones disorganization, wires, random chargers, usb drives, mouses, plethora of various tablets that have been acquired since tablets came to exist. They all still work, so why get rid of them, etc. Start the sanity. In practice it’s not used as a desk. The laptop, tablet or other is taken out from there and used elsewhere, dining room table, couch or bed. I’m not sure if they even makes these armoires anymore. This one is fifteen years old and was build to accommodate a desktop. I use that space to store things in file folders, of things printed on the printer that started this entire episode. However, being able to close those doors and shut away all that mess and insanity is priceless.

[6] This does not actually exist.

[7] ibid

[8] Do not complain to me about stealing from work. I think a few printouts are factored into the salary.

[9] Including, I recently learned, the daily print newspaper. What?!? No wonder they are all losing money. The paper can’t be $2 plus dollars. That’s crazy.

[10] $300 > $2, for the math challenged.

How Many Different Ways to Say Get Off Your Ass and Do Something?

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5,498,349 or there abouts.  

I’m in a rut. I’ve been in a rut. I’m trying to dig my way out of a rut.  I was laid off from a job I despised about a year and a half ago and it was the greatest thing to happen in quite some time.  It was a job which met the definition of everything I didn’t want in a job:  poor management, no strategy, reacting to whatever client was screaming the loudest, politics and backstabbing (this always comes with poor management and no strategy because someone has to be to blame if things don’t go well). Oh, and I worked all the time. Nights and weekends were not my own. I had to feed the beast of crazy. All so someone else higher up would get a larger bonus. Insanity.  

I was happy to be gone. Happy to have a package and some time to ‘figure it all out’.  I knew I had no interest in going back to that sort of environment.  A whole new career, using the skills I had was what I want. Something completely different. So I spent some time pondering. I read books, listened to podcasts, talked to everyone I know.  Follow your passions, don’t follow your passions, utilize the skills you have in a different way, take this quiz/webinar/seminar for some sum of money and all will be made clear.  So many stories that I’ll save for another day. 

One thing they all said, every one, was it was better to start than sit around with analysis paralysis. Try something, experiment, get feedback and change course if necessary. Do not, absolutely not, sit behind your computer and research, but do nothing. 

I can’t say I did nothing, but I did pretty close to nothing. I looked for a job full time, and didn’t focus so much on figuring it out (again). Responsibilities loomed, there were mortgages to pay, food to buy, a gym membership to keep up (after all, exercise keeps you sane).  I looked in different industries and found a job. But it’s not what I really want to do. I still want to figure out what this magical other path for me is. But I let the job take up my time, and I don’t prioritize any of this work. From time to time I pick up yet another book, attend yet another webinar.  But it’s all the same. I have to do the hard work of figuring it out and making it happen. Face any fears and go.  I’ve heard it so many times.  So if I know what I need to start doing, why is it so hard to do?  Even if I know it’s hard to do, this is my life, so why can’t I get on with it? 

Three Quarters 30 Try 2 – Day 1

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What is the Three Quarters 30?   It’s the version of Whole 30 that I am making up for myself because I am a vegetarian.  Whole 30 actually recommends (last I checked, which admittedly was awhile ago) that you eat meat during your 30 days, which isn’t going to happen.  This is part of the reason I gave up on my previous Whole 30 attempt.  Well that and I just wasn’t that into it.  I hated my job and thus needed wine at night.   

Well, I still hate my job, but I’m really in it for the 30 day haul this time because I found The Whole 30 Shopping List for Vegetarians and Vegans.  What the what?   Have they changed their tune or what?  The big difference appears to be the allowance of lentils, tofu, tempeh and some beans.  That is all I was asking for.  We all need our protein.  Now if they could start to look past chickpeas as well, we’d be in business, but hey, it’s only 30 days.  

So what are my goals for Three Quarters 30?   I know Whole 30 is about eliminating food that causes inflammation.  Honestly, if all the foods you can’t have on Whole 30 cause inflammation, my body has been on fire it’s entire life.  I do want to be healthier and detox from some excesses over the holiday.  Removing grains and sugar for awhile seems like a good approach.  The lack of alcohol will be the hardest part, but (sigh) is probably good for me, as well.  So my goals are to see how I feel after, maybe have better skin and if I lose weight, well I’d love that, too.  

So how was my first day?   Keep in mind, I hadn’t really planned out the menu.  It’s been 0 degrees here and I wasn’t going shopping.  For the first week at least, I have to make due with what I have at home.  

I made a smoothy with banana, blueberries, spinach and almond milk (no carrageenan!) .   Later I discovered banana wasn’t on the list.  Whoops.  Since I make them for the week and freeze them, there will be a banana every day this week.  Oh well.

Lunch was a vegetarian chili I made with diced tomatos, bell peppers, black beans (not sure if they are among the beans allowed, but I’m going with it), onion, cumin and then i threw a little bit of corn in because it was here.  Whoops corn isn’t on the list, either.   

Dinner was stir fry broccoli, red peppers, onion, celery, snap peas, watercress and tempeh.   

Snacks were almonds and an apple.   

I drank tea with dinner rather than wine.   I turned down chocolates that were passed around at work.  

And I’m still here to tell the tale!   Also, I was bizarrely not hungry all the time.  Weird.   Yes, it wasn’t perfect according to the list, but much healthier than I have been eating, especially over the holidays, so a win.  

Gym Tips for Guys

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Do not tuck your shirt into lycra bottoms

Do not wear short shorts

Do not wear short shorts with your shirt tucked into them

 

Pretty simple, and yet….   There is a man at my gym who breaks these rules regularly.   Granted he’s in great shape.  He is probably approaching 0% body fat, long and lean.  His workout usually puts the rest of us mere mortals to shame.  The things is his clothes, his workouts, his demenour give off a sense of arrogance and overt pride. 

So my amusement was great when I was walking out of a class tonight.  There he was doing some sort of athletic feat that most of us could only dream about in his short shorts with tight lycra t-shirt tucked in.  Suddenly I hear “oh, this asshole again”.  I turn to look at the woman next to med.  Her eyes are huge.  “Did I say that outloud?  Horrible”.    I tell her no, it’s what everyone is thinking. 

You really don’t want to be this guy… so don’t.

So you think it’s a good idea to have a business person as President Part 2

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If you haven’t worked in a large company, you may not be familiar with how the upper echelons of it’s management think.  To obtain a certain level of control in a large bureaucracy, one must have a certain kind of personality, the kind of personality who doesn’t mind cutting down everyone else to reach the singular goal of making themselves more powerful.  

As the veteran of a few large companies, I can tell you that the common denominator at the top is these guys (and they are mostly guys) believe rules do not apply to them.   Were they like that from the beginning, which helped them get to where they are or did they develop this as they moved up the chain of command in extremely command and control entities, the power and entitlement it grants leading them to believe they live by their own rules?    Does it really matter?  They are where they are, they do what they want and they don’t see limits.  Regulations?  Bah…  change them or find creative ways around them.  Paying what you owe?  When you can expense it to your company?   Come on now.  Firing people who disagree with you?  Goes with the territory.  Expectation of job performance commensurate with ones salary.  You’re funny (note:  they believe they are worth what they are paid, but tell that to anyone in the lower parts of the chain, working like a dog, that it makes sense that the CEO make 10, 20, 100 times more than them).  No matter how bad a CEO messes up, even if they get forced out, they will receive the golden parachute written into their contract. They will walk away with millions, guaranteed.  Even better, they will get another CEO gig.   

Never worked in a large company?  Think you don’t know who I’m talking about?  You do.  They are the person behind you honking when you’re trying to take a left turn, but there is constant oncoming traffic.  They are the person taking a left turn from the far right lane across 2 lanes because who are YOU to be THEIR way?  They will be driving an Audi, BMW, Mercedes… probably an SUV.   They have places to be and they think the rules don’t apply to them.  They are endangering you and your passengers because they don’t give a shit. 

The rules just don’t apply to them.  At least not the same rules that apply to the rest of us.   As a CEO if you don’t like what someone in your organization is doing, you can pull them aside and suggest they ‘let it go’.  Most of the time, whatever it is will be gone because if it isn’t you will be fired or worse, treated viciously badly until you resign, and either way they will bad mouth you in whatever circles they can.  The sense of entitlement this creates, even among those who have shareholders and boards to answer to is staggering.   If I don’t like the rules, I’ll just change them.   Unfortunately for the powerful,, but fortunately for us, the United States is a nation of laws.  Laws can’t just be changed overnight because one of our three branches of government wants it.   Executive Orders can’t change everything.  We do not have a dictatorship, you can’t just go around the other branches of government, (weak though some members of them are).  You can’t run a country like a CEO by just telling everyone what to do and firing those who don’t agree with you (thank you founding fathers, THANK YOU).    There are rules and there are laws in a civilized society.  Let’s hope they are strong enough to withstand a frustrated power broker, not used to not getting his way, not used to working well with others.  I believe we can, but please no more business people as President. 

So you think it’s a good idea for a business person to be President…

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You think a business person knows how to make money, will squeeze efficiencies out, get rid of waste and in doing so lower your taxes?  This is my theory on the thought process, anyway.   My response:  have you ever worked at a large company?   Waste is all around you.  Examples: 

·        Employees who literally do nothing

·        Poor planning resulting in expensive over runs

·        People whose entire job is making Powerpoint presentations full of the latest business jargon (which they spent the morning googling)

·        The lunches.  One can’t possibly expect anyone to meet between 12 – 1 without being provided an expensive, catered lunch!    Certainly everyone will pass out if they wait to eat their own lunch at 1pm. 

·        The swag.  Everyone has t-shirts, fleeces, blankets and towels with the corporate logo on them.  It’s advertising!  

·        The marketing materials.  Whole forests have been destroyed to hand out glossy brochures that no one actually reads at trade shows. 

·        The expense accounts.  So many steaks, so much scotch, so many tickets.

·        The travel.  Oh, hello expensive room service and other expensive services provided to people out of town. 

·        The conferences.  Where people who know less than you present on topics you’re not interested in, but everyone gets to travel and have expense accounts (see above) and get swag from other companies.   Quadruple threat!  

·        The retreats/offsites boondongle.  Oh yes, we must get away from the mundane and ‘think out of the box’ (no doubt someone spent a whole week on the PowerPoints to get ready – see above).   Sometimes on islands or other warm locations within close proximity to golf course(s). 

·        Senior management bonuses totally more than the GDP of some states, even if the company is going down the crapper.   We can’t expect Executives to live on less.  They are the ‘idea’ people.  Again, even if the company is about to declare bankruptcy and go out of business, the bonuses will still be paid.  

Through all of the above, has the price of something you buy ever gone down because a business person wrung efficiencies out?     I’m waiting..   I can’t think of an example.   You think the ‘efficiencies’ will help you… think again.  

AThing I Have Learned

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When in the library, if someone sits down next to you and starts imbibing then opens up their phone to watch videos with the sound on (no headphones):   this is a cry for attention.  Do not engage!   If you ignore them, they will eventually become bored and move to some other area of the library to bother someone else.   Also, bring headphones.  

I’m sorry you need attention so badly, but I have things to do! 

I am afraid..

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Afraid that on Friday there will not be one person in the White House who feels this way…. (watch the entire thing or zoom ahead to 1:45 for the start of the really good part).  

Sam Seaborn: It was high treason, and it mattered a great deal! This country is an idea, and one that’s lit the world for two centuries and treason against that idea is not just a crime against the living! This ground holds the graves of people who died for it, who gave what Lincoln called the last full measure of devotion, of fidelity.

Sam Seaborn: You understand that last full measure devotion to, treason against them is.